Do you really know who you are? I am not speaking of the title you are given but who you are. What I mean is if I said who are you? What would most people say? They would say the titles in which they were/are given. Such as I am a Mom, Dad, sister, brother, aunt, wife, husband etc. Is that who you truly are though? I believe that we as human beings should not be defined by a label society has imposed on us. As we are all capable of being whoever we desire in our hearts. Find your purpose in turn you find your happiness that no one can take from you.
About 3+ years ago, I was in a job that I was in charge of the main dining room for the student body at a prestigious culinary school. My staff consisted of many students, however we had a disability program so I also had some individuals that had some handicaps; nonetheless can do their jobs really well and function. During my time there I was often told when I would help the students outside of my job description that I needed to not do that. I have had a heart to help people from a very early age. I believe my student workers knowledge surpassed cleaning a table properly or organizing a refrigerator.
Long story short, after some time; I could no longer stand being in such an environment. It inhibited me from being who I always thought I could be. A woman that is kind, not bitter; a woman that will go above and beyond the call of duty without hesitation; the woman that works really hard each day to ensure that whoever comes into my world leaves a better person. I eventually gave them my 3 week noticed. I had all intentions of moving to Florida but God had a different plan for me. I moved back home with my Mom and it just so happened she broke her ankle in 3 places and needed me to take care of her.
So I took care of everything for her, while digging deep to find out who I am. I have associated myself with all these titles that were given to me that I felt like I was letting people down when I didn’t live up to what they thought I should be. Not at all seeing the detrimental psychological affect it had on me. I didn’t have a job for 9 months. I can’t lie, there were days I just looked up and asked God what did I do wrong? Why did he hate me so much when he knew all the hurt my last position caused and now I have no job and in state that I always said I never wanted to live in. Little did I know that my biggest blessing and the discovery of myself was in the place in which I didn’t want to be.
I finally got a job. This isn’t just a basic job it is EVERYTHING I asked God for. I asked for a boss that would make me be a better person personally and professionally, I got that. I am getting paid 3x more than what I was in that horrific job. Best of all, they allow me to interact with students without being penalized that it isn’t a part of my job description. My coworkers found out that I am a huge advocate for diversity and helping people be their best; hence is why I am currently pursuing a master’s degree in counseling specializing in life coaching.
My first year, they asked me to address the incoming class of student of what diversity means and how we can change the world one mind at a time. They also asked me to participate with the students in black history month. By no means is any of this a part of my job title. My boss advocates me doing all this as he knows my heart if soft for kids. After I did my first diversity presentation, they have asked me to do it each year. Mind you the other job reprimanded me for doing what my new job now embraces.
Today was especially special. I walked into work and because of my positive demeanor my coworkers got me positive sticky notes. We just wrapped up black history month and we had a fair and it turned out well! The director of admissions, who is very fond of my dedication to diversity and helping our student body out in any way, walked into my office and said this…
What did you think of the fair? I said I thought it was great but I have a great concept for next year. He then pulls up a chair and said please do tell. I told him I would like to do an around the world diversity event. Where it is a campus wide activity. Not only did he love the idea, he placed me in charge of next year’s entire event. He said I have no budget and whatever I need to let him know.
Right after that, last week one of my co-workers asked if she could talk to me about a problem she was having. Of course I said sure what’s up. She said, I think that people have a misunderstanding of who the Black Panthers were. She thought that every group has a good and bad side. I told her that I agreed. She said PBS has a documentary on the Black Panthers. I said that’s great. She then said that she didn’t know how well that would go over. Simply because the fear of them telling their parents (who pay $36k for their kid to come to school for 1 year) that they are being taught about a group that had such negative connotations to them.
I explained to her that she should ask the head in charge and just see how it goes. Also another option is to have the kids watch it on their own time and then have a discussion about it. So if they had additional questions or just want to talk about it that they are in a safe environment to do so. So today she saw me and gave me a huge hug. I said is everything ok, she said thanks to you, they are allowing me to show it at school and it’s open to EVERYONE. Also she wanted to know if I can do a diversity group session with the kids to enlighten them about accepting diversity and how important it is to have an open mind.
LADIES AND GENTS…In one day, EVERY SINGLE THING in my past job that I was told not to do, my new job seeks me out to help. My job has never asked anyone to speak about the benefits of diversity and why it is important to look at people through their hearts; yet somehow they gravitate to me which I thank God for.
Moral of the story, no matter who, no matter what; never give up. Know who you are in your heart, never lose it. Never allow anyone to take it away from you. That is your true identity! Your purpose in life is who you are and not the label society gives you but who God says you are. Understand that with finding out who you are, you will feel defeated sometimes, you will feel if all this is worth it, am I doing something wrong. That is when God is doing his best work. It is during those times of feeling you are outside your comfort zone is when you are growing into who you meant to be your entire life. It is when we learn to forgive, look deep within our hearts and see the world not just through our physical eyes, but with the eyes in our hearts and through Gods eyes. We can have the doors of possibilities to change this world for the better.
Look for the good in the bad situations, appreciate the bad as it allows you to grow. Never give up!
This song is one of my favorites! Take a listen! The lyrics are awesome….
“You’ll never fly, if you’re too scared of the height”…
So I say spread your wings and fly. Trust God, believe in yourself, and seek your purpose. You will know what it is, for it is something you do naturally and you never get tired of doing it!